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Sunday, May 20, 2007

Allow Your Daughter to Seek Her Dreams, Not Yours

I knew at the age of 16 that I was passionate about Jesus,
and beauty and fashion, but could I turn that into a career.
Maybe. My mom and dad thought it would be safer to be a counselor,and began encouraging me to pursue the education
necessary to be a licensed counselor. Unfortunately, it is not my passion or my dream.

For several years, however,I pursued the field of counseling one
hundred percent. I went through many graduate school applications and grueling interviews. I was accepted to three different graduate school programs. I even took several classes in one particular program, only to realize more and more that it was not my calling or my passion.

Well known Christian author Max Lucado suggests in his work,The Cure for the Common Life that instead of asking our children, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" a better question would be "How can I help you become what God has already designed you to be?" You see, God designed me for a special purpose, to be a specific thing, and He has done that for each individual on the face of this earth, so it is important that we are allowed to be what it is God designed for us to be.

God set his plan for each of us in motion the day that we were born. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." We are all as Christians certain of that great plan, that story of our life.

We all have a story, and as we live our lives, we are living out our story. We must also allow our children to live their story. Lucado says STORY stands for:

S - our strengths, those things that we do well,

T - our topics, the things we are most interested in,

O – our optimal conditions, the conditions in which we do our best work,
perform to the best of our ability,

R - our relationships, those with whom we share and learn from,

Y - and our yes moments, those primary outcomes that bring us the most joy.

We must allow our daughters to live out their very own story. A card I got recently as congratulations on my new baby girl said this:

"She will dream her very own dreams, Maybe she will look like you, talk like you, smile like you … maybe she’ll sing, paint and dance like you, but she’ll dream her very own dreams."

Dreams are important, they give us something to look forward to with anticipation. I know you had your own dreams, now allow your daughter to not only have hers, but to live them out. Be her biggest cheerleader and watch her win at this game we call life. Help her along the way with words of encouragement, many hugs and love and even some discipline if it is in order. However, do not discourage your daughter from living out her dreams. God gave them to her and it is important that she follows His path for her life. You can be assured that if she is following God, that there are many plans in her heart, but the Lord is directing her steps.


Alyssa Avant is a Christian Author and Speaker who helps moms connect with their daughters. A work at home mom , Alyssa is the founder of Beauty By Design Ministries, http://www.beautybydesignonline.com/

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